Limiting Beliefs: The Invisible Lenses Through Which We See The World

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When we were children, we often heard countless sayings from parents, teachers, relatives, or even the culture around us. Some were words of wisdom, but many carried hidden rules about how we “should” live, what we “must” believe, and even how we “should” feel. Over time, these sayings quietly became part of our internal belief system.

In psychology, they’re called limiting beliefs. These are beliefs we inherit without questioning—so familiar they feel like our own truths, when in fact they’re borrowed voices.

With time, limiting beliefs become like invisible lenses through which we see the world. They shape how we interpret situations, make choices, judge ourselves, and relate to others. The challenge is to notice what you’ve absorbed from others—and realize it’s not yours to carry.

Often, we feel an inner tension: a wish to live differently, held back by a rule we never chose. That “rule” is often an inherited belief.

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The Consequences of Not Being Aware

When we aren’t aware of these beliefs, we repeat emotional and behavioral patterns without understanding why. This can show up as:

• staying in unsatisfying relationships
• struggling with self-worth
• feeling stuck in life decisions
• sabotaging opportunities
• believing we cannot want or ask for more

These silent rules limit how much we allow ourselves to receive, to dream, or to grow. They keep us small, even when life is calling us into something bigger.

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A Self-Reflective Question to Explore Your Beliefs

Here’s one powerful question to help uncover a belief that may still shape your life today:

What is one phrase your parents, caregivers, or culture repeated when you were a child that still echoes in your mind now?

Examples might include:

• “Don’t ask for too much; be satisfied with what you have.”
• “Life is hard; nothing comes easy.”
• “Always put others first.”
• “In relationships, the man should always pay.”

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How These Beliefs Still Shape You Today

These simple phrases can influence your life for decades:

• “Don’t ask for too much” — keeps you from negotiating, dreaming, or wanting more.
• “Life is hard” — makes you expect struggle even when joy is possible.
• “Always put others first” — leads to guilt when you set boundaries.
• “The man should always pay” — shapes how you view fairness in relationships.

Repeated often enough, these phrases become part of identity — even though they were never yours to begin with.

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How Therapy Helps You Unlearn Limiting Beliefs

One of the most powerful aspects of therapy is uncovering these unconscious patterns. By questioning limiting beliefs, you begin a journey of self-discovery that is surprising, liberating, and deeply transformative.

In therapy, I often guide clients to notice the voices that aren’t truly theirs—those old sayings that show up in daily life. With this awareness comes choice. Instead of living on autopilot, you can begin making decisions guided by your authentic self, not by someone else’s expectations.

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Step Into Your Own Voice

You don’t have to live by beliefs that keep you small or disconnected from your true self.

Therapy offers a safe space to uncover these hidden rules, understand where they came from, and decide consciously what you want to carry forward.

If you’re curious about how these beliefs may be shaping your life, I invite you to explore them with me in therapy. Together, we’ll uncover the rules you inherited, reconnect with your own values, and help you create a life led not by borrowed beliefs — but by your own authentic voice.

Warmly,
Andressa